It’s obviously a little too late to say Happy New Year, so I’ll just write my reflection of the past year, 2014. Last year was quite a year, there were several things that make it significant, for me. So many ups, making up for several downs. It was one of the toughest and the best years I’ve had so far.

We can never say enough about how time can fly so fast, hell, it always fly so fast and 2014 was not an exception. I can still picture vividly how I started the year. A mixture of happiness and sadness. Happy because I got to visit my boyfriend and attend his graduation, had a little vacation, spent the New Year’s Eve with him for the first time, although we’d been together longer than that. Sad because those moments were fleeting and I got to go back home, then back to school, away from him again.

I began 2014 as a senior with finals, thesis, and job hunting laid ahead of me. I knew it was going to be a tough year but now that it had passed, I find the phase “everything is impossible until it’s done” to be true. Some time ago I couldn’t even picture myself coming up with a topic for my thesis, let alone finishing it on time, but I did. Well, technically I didn’t meet the deadline I had set for myself but it was still on time for early graduation.

Graduating from a reputable university with magna cum laude turned out to be unable to immediately land me the perfect job. And what I deemed as a perfect job was working in a high-paying multinational company, which I found out to be wrong later. But, let’s focus on the horror of job-hunting first. It was such a dreadful process to go through and every dismissed application had successfully torn my confidence to pieces. It was only after I had idled for three months, after my desired company decided that I was not a suitable candidate, I got offered my first job, my current job. It’s…fine. Not so close to perfect, not the one I had always pictured, not where I had always thought I’d be, but it’s fine. It fits the criterias, my criterias. It’s not in the ever crowded capital, it’s a multinational company, it gives me international exposure, it pays decent, etc.

Indifferent might be the best word to describe my feeling towards my job. I don’t detest it nor do I fond of it. I like it, maybe, because I’ve learned so much from it, my boss is very nice and is such a great mentor. Although I’m a bit disappointed with how they manage their human resources, I can say that it’s a pretty nice job. Lots of fresh graduate out there might wanna kill for this job, actually. But I don’t know, something just don’t feel right, I felt like this isn’t what I want to do.

That’s one of the reason I decided to advance my plan to go back to school, to continue master degree. I have always wanted to get a master degree but the initial plan was to obtain at least two years of working experiences first.  After months of battle with myself and went on-and-off about continuing my study, I finally applied for a scholarship to fund my master degree which I plan to take in the UK.

I had months of uncertainty because there was no safety net yet, I didn’t know whether I would get the scholarship or not. If I get it I could leave anytime I want, the sooner the better. But If i don’t, I’d have to stick around a little longer, while I had got sick of the job, figuratively and literally. I got hospitalized for the first time since a very long time. My families back home kept telling me to quit but my ego still got the best of me that I decided that I wouldn’t quit without a better offer. That has always been my motto, I don’t settle for less than I deserve.

The offer came eventually, at the end of the year. Such a perfect time to close the year. I almost couldn’t believe it when my friend texted me that I got the scholarship. My hands were shaking as I scrolled through the scholarship recipients list and found my name on it. I was so much happier that I got to share that moment with my boyfriend, as he was in town to visit me. My happiness quadrupled because I had him as a company to go through the last days of 2014. He’s always been the one who support and even sometimes push me to do things that I should have done but too afraid to. He brings out the best of me and that is why, amidst all the great things that happened to me last year, he’s still the highlight of my 2014. Thank you, baby.