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This question has been bothering me for quite some time that I had to write it here just to let it out of my mind. Not only people who aren’t really fond of me, oblivious acquaintances, friends (although they never say it explicitly), my mom, but even I myself ask it sometimes. Even though the reason is sitting crystal clear in the back of my head sometimes I just can’t help to wonder too, you know. I mean yes, I got a pretty generous and prestigious scholarship and I can go to practically any university in the world that I wish so why didn’t I go for the ivy league? Was I scared? Was I not confident of my ability? Lots of those who wonder like to think that, of course. The answer is no. Never did I doubt my ability nor was I scared to apply to those prestigious schools. In fact, I wanted to. This might sound over-confident and borderline arrogant but I wasn’t scared to apply. Well yea, maybe the odds of me getting accepted to those top school was slim but once again I wasn’t afraid to apply. But I didn’t. I chose one university and never apply to other schools that might be more prestigious. I wasn’t playing safe or aiming low, I was being pragmatic (like how I always be, apparently).

Deciding to go to graduate school was not a simple matter. Of course on the outside it seems like it’s my way of getting out of the dreaded job I had, that I’d prefer studying to working. That’s not entirely wrong but it’s not my main reason of going to graduate school, it’s just a bonus. Thus, I put a lot into account before I apply for the scholarship and to the university. I had done a lot of research before I decide which school I’d apply to. I visit every one of their websites and reading every modules they offer. Post graduate is a big deal, I didn’t want to choose the wrong program in the wrong university just because it sit on the top rank and/or located in my dream city. Especially when I’m fully funded by my country’s taxpayers’ money. I might not be the most noble or “nationalist” person there is, but if I did do that it wouldn’t be fair for them and for me as well. Because I wouldn’t study the subject that I really want to study or that I’m not really good at. I could try, but I can’t guarantee a good outcome. And I don’t want that. Passion is quite overrated and I refrain myself from using that word but what I’ve chosen now is pretty close to it. I know what I choose would benefit me at least and might benefit others in any way (who knows? But finger-crossed)

By writing this I’m not saying that I chose a low level school whatsoever. It’s a long-established and prominent university in the UK. It might not sit on the very top of the university rank (it’s on the list), but it offers the program that suits me best. Of course some people will keep turning the blind-eye and that’s fine. I don’t need anybody’s approval but myself. I know what’s best for me and Ivy League wasn’t one.

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