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Working in a multinational company had always been my dream since I first worked for my final thesis in the university. One of the reason was because I’ve always wanted to get more international exposure. I want to be a part of international community because I have always seen myself as an International citizen and that’s what I deserve. The other reason was, as shallow as it might sound, I heard it pays well and that’s every fresh graduate’s dream! Little did I know everything comes with a price (Duh, seriously, Dee could you be more naive?)

I had began applying for job even while I was still working on my thesis, because I wanted to enter the working environment as soon as I graduate. The first company I tried was, well, a quite well-known multinational company from fast-moving consumer goods industry. I went so far, I even got to the final interview with the Managers. But I was so unprepared that I kept blaming myself several months after they announced that I didn’t get it.

It was not the last multinational company I applied to. I had written pages of cover letters, submitted numerous applications, followed tiring and long procedures, and gone to plenty of interviews, but none of them succeed, even three months after my graduation. I even came to conclusion that I wasn’t good enough to work in a multinational company. There were so much pressures on me and I got tired and depressed. Thankfully I have such a great supporting boyfriend who kept encouraging me throughout the process. Then there was this one company, my mother had mentioned this several times because her friends used to work there. It wasn’t all bad, although it’s by definition not so well-known but it’s still a multinational company and the job descriptions seemed challenging, so I applied and I got it.

The job was indeed challenging because I was literally thrown into the deep end. No MT program, no established training, I just go with my boss’ instructions. Even though I had trouble fitting in with the environment at first, but I could say that I enjoy the tasks, because I get to apply what I had learned in university while also gaining some new knowledge as well. But then the working hours went crazy, one time I had to stay until 1 a.m, the other time until 6 a.m, with a lot of unpaid overtime in between. Some people told me that’s it’s nothing compared to …i’m not sure, they just said that it’s nothing. Maybe compared to working in hell? Anyway, I just couldn’t keep up with it anymore. It’s not that I’m lazy or anything but I just feel like the juice doesn’t worth the squeeze. I know that work-life balance is just a myth, but hey, I don’t even have a life and it’s risking my health. I like the job, really, but some things are just too unreasonable that it made me think maybe working in a multinational company is not my cup of tea. Or maybe just this company that doesn’t go with my style. Either way, I can’t continue doing this. But then it stroke me, if this isn’t my thing, then what is? I don’t know what I want to do in my life and that’s terrifying.

I know I enjoy studying more than working so in the meantime I’m aspiring to be a professional student. Thankfully, the plan seems to work (read here). If everything goes smoothly I will become a student again (ok, professional student) by September next year! It doesn’t solve the problem, though. As much as I hope that I can get paid by just studying, I can’t be a professional student forever. I still don’t know what I want to do in life. Maybe I will figure it out after I finish my master degree, maybe sooner. Heaven knows. But at least, for now, I know what I don’t want to do. And that’s enough. For now.

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